Tag Archives: Selfies in the theater

Suicide Squad: I call Shenanigans


Suicide Squad, one of the most anticipated and well marketed films of recent superhero movie times. Anticipated by nerds of all sizes, from an array of nationalities, and DC lovers and DC-not quite lovers alike. We got it, we went to see it, and since then the internet has been ablaze with criticism. Well, to be honest with ourselves some folks were kicking hell even before the first trailer hit YouTube. But I’ll talk about that later. All in all it doesn’t deserve all this hate, it really doesn’t, and here’s why.

I recommend that you watch it, as this review will contain some spoilers. It’s inevitable that a rant of this magnitude will contain spoilers, so if you have yet to see it, please scroll no further, but know you have my staunch encouragement to watch this movie.

Almighty then  folks, you passed the point, now here why I call shenanigans on both the studio and the critics.

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  1. Everybody, but everybody has something to say about Harley. Played well by the very diverse and endearing Margot Robbie, Harley is the former psychiatrist of the Joker, who he drove insane, tortured and then dipped in the same ooze that gave him his signature look. She has seen many an interpretation even in my relatively short lifetime in her many comic arcs, however the one fundamental fact has always stood true, she has Stockholm and is, for lack of a better phrase, completely off her rocker. I think the movie tried to soften the abuse part, maybe thinking it would damage our sensibilities. Shenanigans I tell you, our sensibilities need to learn to appreciate the original art.

This made a lot of women apparently uncomfortable as they figured little girls would want to use her as an example, which leads me to believe that either, we’ve been teaching our daughters that an abusive significant other is the one to have, or the folks making the fuss have very little idea about what it is that actually carries on with the comics. Shenanigans again!! This is a franchise based on comics after all, which should make research one of the most fun things ever, especially since you don’t even have to enter your local neighborhood nerdtopia anymore. In any case, I find that Margot ( may I call you Margot?) did great. Hat tipped to you Hun.

Suicide squad

2. Jared Leto is no Heath LedgerNow we can all agree that a. the Batman franchise has become a world of dark psychological thrill, and b. Heath was arguable the best Joker of life. I mean EVER. Jared then had the cards stacked against him from the time he signed this contract.

I don’t know who orchestrated his costumes, what with the tattoos and the teeth, but we need to find that guy and ask him about his feelings towards his Parents. Suffice it to say I feel about this Joker the way many of you felt about the latest Lex Luther. He did not impress, he was definitely not what I expected, and he deviated far from any of the Joker personas I have known before. Glen tells me I should just sit back and accept it, as the tone of the movie is set by whatever psychosis this director thinks the bat is suffering from. But I call shenanigans, could we not have gotten a little more energy at least? Gawd. This Joker, felt lethargic and generic, like for research he just watched The Godfather and fell asleep half way through and just decided to wing it. The Joker in the Killing Joke was better man. GAWD.

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3. Everybody forgot this was a Bad guy movie. Granted that most of these folks weren’t inherently evil. Harley was the only one there, who seemed genuinely true to the whole I’m-bad-and-I-like-it shtick. Some critics apparently took this as the greatest of cinema sins, but what is a villain really? Either someone who is good in their own eyes and ‘misunderstood’, someone psychotic, or someone who wants to take over the world. Come to think of it, that’s what I like about the villains of the DCEU they are unapologetic. Deadshot likes shooting things and is proud of his rep as a perfect marksman. His only miss ever being the Bat. Diablo is a fire god, nuff said. Crock is a crock with humanish traits, etc.

I find the way the flashbacks and back story for each character were integrated in a satisfactory fashion. For the team, I am satisfied. I think they could have done the soundtrack better. I expected it to feel all John Wick, but ack, who can do it all?

4. These two characters. These two characters, annoyed me to no end. Both had godlike powers that they severely under utilized. Is it because the studio felt we couldn’t handle the power? Is it because villains are supposed to be dumb and thwart themselves? I don’t know. But if I was a fire god capable of melting the heart of another god, I would melt that mother into goo. Not give up and let a bomb do it. A bomb, and not even a nuke? Really? Is more effective than the force of the sun? Shenanigans!!!

As for little miss overly sinuous. I’m all for a little gyration, but she was just a bit much on the wink up part. Calm your ass down on the hip motion and figure out how to use your powers dammit. In the end the epic fail of this lower level boss was her inability to exploit all the greatness she displayed before the last 15 minutes of the movie. You mean to tell me you can teleport to some Asian country and steal their military secrets but you can’t get away from a sword stroke, or materialize around your heart as it flies through the air? Why would you fight with swords anyway oh all powerful millennia old witch? Ugh, what is it with the DCEU and ruining their movies with bad climaxes?


5. Bow down and worship at the feet of Viola Davis. Spoiler, Spoiler, big big big BIG spoiler!!!!!!!!!!! This woman is by far the best and most villainous part of this movie. They tell us the Squad are the bad guys but in the hierarchy of evil in this story they are at level two. All of them including the witch. Below them are the henchmen, and below them are the solder boy and Katana. At the top of baddy bad list is Amanda Waller, played by Viola Davis. Who makes me fully believe, in her sexy as hell brand of Sociopath.

Through the film we see her kill indiscriminately, threaten and main and it is absolutely everything the trailers promised. She is like the Anti-Nick Fury, but better. Way way better. I love it, Love her, JUST LOVE!!!

On that note, I guess it’s time for me to wrap it up. I’m sure some nerd out there reading this is having the aneurysm of objection. I give this a 8. -3 for the witch and her brother, – 1 for Heathen and Sucker for pain only coming up prominently in the credits, -1 Joker, -1 for the unnecessary Batman appearances and then add back 4 for Viola’s performance.

Go watch it, read the comics, emote, then opinionate. Love you guys, see ya later.

Oh I almost forgot, for the folks who continually blinded me by taking selfies during the movie. Please smack yourselves a lot. When are y’all gonna learn compassion? And why did you waste the money to buy a ticket to sit in a dark room taking selfies? Ugh. Shenanigans!!!!!